This weekend, anyway.
I’M BACK.
I’m teaching a summer class, and it starts this week. Gotta finish takin’ care of bidness, then go to bed early so they won’t find out what a MONSTER I am lol. I’m actually a pretty cool teacher. IF I MAY SAY SO MYSELF, lolol.
Not complaining about that like some little shithead, just saying, I’m more hungover than your mom the day after you were conceived.
Also, my boss is pretty far up my asshole this weekend about getting the course website completely in order before classes start on Monday. So I’ll be working when I can.
Here’s a quickie pic of pug at the beach, more pics to come today. YOU CAN ACT FASCINATED NOW.
From menses, of course. Stringy ones provide a whip effect.
One really shouldn’t. It may cause one to make cunty-faced decisions.
Same goes for you males. Don’t think with someone else’s cunt. It’s a slippery slope.
Yeah, I’m about to drop an egg, can you tell? You’re lucky to not be around me, for those of you who don’t have to physically be around me 
. For the rest of you: sorries!
P.S. I’m going to the beach Fri-Sun, but I’ll be in my special “women’s” condition…..DO YOU THINK I WLL ATTRACT SHARKS?? I’m going to ‘pon it up, of course, but still….HA doesn’t want to get eaten this week. :(
hi do you think I need to clean this? Last year:
As of this morning:
(Yes, that’s a pink wig. Don’t even worry about it.)
Update — one for depth measure:
It looks like shit. How many loads of laundry do you think that is? I’m actually going to clean it, so whoever guesses the closest gets something from me in the mail (liquid, gas or mineral).
when JenEffect and I hang out…
I eat your queso. I eat it up!
There is some queso in me. I want no one else to have it. I hate most people.
We are fucking pigz.
And my FACE.
Remember when I almost cracked my skull on the hammock last September? I do, too. But bros, this time it wasn’t my fault, okay?:
Look at that shit. It can no longer support the 105 lbs. that is Halfassitude.
As we all know, I am a genius, so I’ll be shopping online for new hammocks today — while laying in the hammock. I just can’t quit you, thing that elevates me 3 feet off the air and sometimes hurts me. I hope this turns into a Tina Fey scar.
She is my idol. I would wife the shit out of her if I were gay.
Filed under: chillin today
Excuse this. Programming joke for the nerdz.
Should people who currently major in Women’s Studies be shot?
(JUST KIDDING, okay)
Did Matthew Broderick cheat on Sar Jess Park?
Cool:
Not Cool:
Will I ever take my Christmas Tree down? 5/7/2009: Still up.
Did I just commission someone to custom-make me these shoes? Should I be shot?
I want to buy her things, and cook for her, and laugh and cry with her, and sing Sweet Home Alabama with her, forever and ever, Amen.
Filed under: he-celebs
Come out please.
There’s my chippy.
If you want the password for the post right below this one, just email me at halfassitude@gmail.com and I’ll give it to you. I don’t care who you are, as long as you’re not my grandma. So even if you’re a stranger, feel free to ask for the password. I promise it will be anticlimactic.
